As always, credit where it's due to Mollie Erickson who invented DNR - JTI on her much funnier blog, found here.
You've seen Jimmy Fallon's Thank You Notes, you've seen riffs on Thank You Notes, but today, please enjoy one of my favorite concepts: "Do Not Respond - Just Take It."
This was invented by Mollie Erickson, a smart and fabulous woman I know, and every time I read DNR - JTI's on her own blog, it makes me giggle and makes me think.
The concept? Here are some thoughts. I don't want a response, but want to be able to say out loud. Wouldn't that be nice?
Dear Bump on my Chin,
I have been patient with you. I have not been violent with you. And now, it's time for you to go away. If you don't, I will be forced to take drastic measures and YOU DON'T WANNA GO THERE. DNR - JTI.
Dear People who Complain about "the January Crowd" at their Gyms,
Remember when you were trying something for the first time that you felt vulnerable about, and no one complained or made fun of you? Right. Let's try to extend that grace to these sweet folks. Sorry you have to share your leg press machine. Maybe offer a word of encouragement instead of sneering and Snapchatting someone who can't use it very well. DNR - JTI.
Dear Friends who Know More about Politics Than Me,
Thank you for your patience and your wisdom. I love learning from you and hearing the great thoughts in your brains. I regularly plagiarize you and sometimes don't give you credit, but you probably knew that already. You are wonderful and brilliant. DNR - JTI.
Dear Friends who Know Less about Politics Than I Do,
Thanks for making me feel like a genius. I'm just plagiarizing my friends who know more than me. I should just link you guys up. But I won't, because I'm selfish. DNR - JTI.
Dear Bears who Live in My Backyard,
I'm so fascinated by you and I'm kind of scared of you. Please stop slashing my garbage can to get to our delicious, rotting leftovers. I know I'm not supposed to, but I'll leave a to-go box after every meal by the back door if you'll just cut it out with the trash can. ...seriously. DNR - JTI.
You are the WORST. I would rather clean toilets than do you. You are the multi-step chore from HELL. It's not enough to take clean the clothes to the washing machine. NOOOO. Now I have to move them to another appliance. Then I have to make sure I'm around when they're finished drying so the clothes won't wrinkle. THEN I have to fold them perfectly. THEN I have to put them away?! Are you kidding?? That's like 40 steps for one chore. This is why clean clothes sit in a basket in my room for a week, because you have EXHAUSTED ME, Laundry. DNR - JTI.
Dear Mary Catherine,
Remember the first house you and Jordan lived in where you didn't have a washer and dryer? And how you had to take your laundry to your parents' house? And how you said once you had one of your own that you'd never complain about laundry again? Yeah. So, shut up. DNR - JTI.
Dear Girl in her Twenties Who's Toying Around with Pursuing Her Dream,
You need to get after it. Life isn't that long and WHAT POSSIBLE THING is stopping you?? Make a goal. Work toward it. Stop piddling around on the Internet or dreaming about it. Just do it. You are the best and I believe in you, and I bet everyone else does, too. DNR - JTI.