With those fateful words, Jack Berger broke up with Carrie Bradshaw, and I am breaking up with recapping The Bachelor.
UGH, I KNOW, I AM SO CONFLICTED ABOUT THIS CHOICE, Y'ALL. It's horrible. Do you still like me?!
Here's the deal: normally, after a season finishes in the spring, we get a nice little break with the nonsense that is Bachelor in Paradise before the next real season starts up in the fall. But Chris Harrison is a thirsty little rat and he just can't STAND to wait for the publicity he's going to get by having the first Black bachelorette, so he's moving this train right along.
Which makes it a challenge for those of us who re-cap to keep up.
Jordan and I have just got so much going on this summer (more about that soon) that getting up at 4:30 AM on Tuesday mornings to screengrab the show isn't feasible. (Do you feel sorry for me? You shouldn't because I totally did it to myself. ...okay maybe a little sorry.)
Now - this doesn't mean I won't be watching. I will be watching every single second. I'm playing in a fantasy league. And, if I can swing it, I'll be roping Jordan into a 30-minute weekly podcast recapping the episode. (Would you listen to that, by the way? On Tuesday mornings?)
So it has nothing to do with the show itself and everything to do with the amount of time I've got to devote to it. I think this season is probably going to be particularly star-studded and out of control since they've been promo-ing the HELL out of Rachel since the moment they decided she was taking this gig.
I hope she doesn't turn into a monster. Please, Rachel, WE LOVE YOU!!! Also, did she close the gap in her teeth?! I'm going to be really sad if so. It looks like yes. But I loved the gap!
So, anyway. There's my Friday confession. I was nervous about telling you guys, but I knew it had to be done before the season started, so there it is.
And you're probably all,
I love you people. See ya Monday.