How Pure Barre Changed My Life.

Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones, you guys, but I am feeling particularly emotional about my last Pure Barre class this afternoon. At noon, I'll teach my last class before taking some time off to go grow this sweet baby. 

It's definitely time - my "demo's," where the instructor shows the clients how to set up positions, are getting a little laughable with this bump in the way. The clients at our studio have been so patient with all things pregnancy, particularly with the times when I'd get a move set up and then blank out completely. "Heavy tailbone, and...huh. Hmm. OH YEAH! Okay, 2 pulses down!" Hot mess. 

That kind of grace and community is just one of the many reasons I have loved this workout. If you've been following my blog for a while, you may remember this post about me going to Pure Barre for the first time, then an update after I gave it a shot for about a month, posted here. I've been taking Pure Barre since March 2016 and teaching since August of the same year, so I've spent a lot of time in that studio. Here are my thoughts as I put the mic on for the last time (for a while, at least!) this afternoon: 

1. Pure Barre is the most effective workout I've ever done. 

Please ignore my weirdly huge left knee??

Please ignore my weirdly huge left knee??

From a purely exercise-based place, all the emotion aside, I cannot say enough about these classes. My background in exercise was pretty limited in terms of what I'd tried in earnest. I grew up running (very slowly, but running), and that had always been enough. As I graduated from college, I realized that running alone wasn't going to cut it. I added in some light arms and ab work, but it was always exactly that: running for 2.5/3 miles, then arms, then abs, then I'd leave the gym. 

I'd done group classes like Zumba, pilates, and yoga, and found myself really digging the class atmosphere. I'm a person who is pushed harder by the presence of other, more in-shape people. And running was starting to get hard on my knees and shins. 

Enter: Pure Barre. I started this workout a few months after an ankle injury that prevented me from running regularly. The difference I saw in my ENTIRE BODY - arms, abs, thighs, butt, posture, strength level, endurance - took about three weeks to start and hasn't stopped yet. I don't feel like I ever plateaued, I don't feel like it ever got easy. One of the complaints I hear is that Pure Barre isn't enough cardio. I'd encourage you to attend one of the new Pure Empower classes, a 45-minute cardio-centric class that has even the instructors dripping sweat. WOOF (but in the best way).

It has changed my body, my confidence in myself, and my perception of my own strength. I'm not an Olympian, but it turns out I can work pretty hard and achieve the results I want. Who knew?? 

2. The clients are incredible. 

Cuties Cher and Mary Frances at Halloween last year!

Cuties Cher and Mary Frances at Halloween last year!

One of the things that Pure Barre Asheville has cultivated is a ubiquitous sense of community and positivity. When you hit the door, you'll be greeted by name by anyone standing in the lobby. For me, these days, it's been, "Look at you, cute pregnant girl!! How are you feeling??" (This happens on days when I am most certainly NOT cute, so that should tell you something about the level of support these clients offer me all the time!) 

My very first time, I was so nervous. Upon entering the studio, I was greeted by the women who became my "8:30 family" (the class time I always chose) - Linda, Vanessa, and Kendra. These ladies, ranging in age from younger than me to closer to my parents' age, made me feel so welcome and right at home. I include the part about their ages to add another dimension to the wonder of Pure Barre - I know of a client we have who is 19; I know of a client who is in her 70's. And these are REGULAR clients. The same goes for size, shape, and race. We've got clients all across the board, all of whom show up and prove their inner badass every single time. We show up to work out, not to put on a fashion show, not to judge each other. It's the most supportive workout environment I've ever seen - every SINGLE time.

There is something about a group of women (although we have several male clients too, who I absolutely adore!!) banding together to lift each other up that is all too rare in this world. Girl power is a THING. The Spice Girls had it right. And Pure Barre is absolutely dripping with it.  

3. The team I teach with is next-level amazing. 

Fellow instructor Christina and me, also at Halloween last year! 

Fellow instructor Christina and me, also at Halloween last year! 

Pure Barre is hard. There's no getting around it. It's a challenge mentally and physically to push yourself beyond what you think you're capable of doing. In order to feel good and encouraged by that challenge, rather than defeated by it, you need a team of people who's going to ensure you see yourself as a dadgum fitness warrior. That's exactly what exists at PB Asheville. 

These girls are just precious and delightful and energetic and wonderful and uplifting and ALL the rest of the adjectives. It doesn't hurt that they're all knockouts, either. I mean, why not have something pretty to look at while you're sweating your vital organs out? 

I moved to Asheville with no friends or family, and have found both here. I love sitting around after class and chatting with my fellow instructors when the studio is empty and no one else is around. We've shared fears, hopes, developments in our dating lives, pregnancy stories, career moves, engagement stories, house-building excitement - it's just a really special group of people.

There is no greater gift than helping another woman realize her potential - to see it written across her face that she did it after all, even when she thought she couldn't. I've watched clients go from not being able to hold a plank position for more than 10 seconds to breezing through the 90-second plank during warmup. I've seen people struggle through a few push ups early on, then conquer those things with no problem after a couple of months. 

Pure Barre changes people's lives because it changes the way people see into themselves. One of the things you'll hear repeated on the mic from instructors is, "You're stronger than you think." 

Well, you are. 

4. Carrying this baby around is a lot easier. 

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I mean, I don't even want to imagine what carrying this monster baby around would be like if I didn't have a strong core to start with, thanks to PB. 

(Probably very hard.) 

A strong body and mind going into a pregnancy is something that's helped me exponentially. Not to mention walking into a studio three-four times a week where people say, "You look great!" even if you don't FEEL great; where people are pushing themselves to be their best. It makes me word harder, sweat more, and, most importantly, keep showing up and giving it my best shot. I am not Gal Gadot by any stretch (holler at your girl who filmed parts of Wonder Woman while she was 5 months pregnant ARE YOU KIDDING ME), but I can hold a 90-second plank in my sixth month of pregnancy, damnit. And that's not half bad. 

-- 

So, for now, farewell to teaching. It is weird to close this particular chapter because I feel like this was the last thing to "go." Months ago, when I was planning out when I'd probably need to step away, this day seemed like it was years in the future. It's here, and it means that Jordan's and my life is about to start getting really different with the arrival of this little baked potato. 

I am so grateful for this year of my life I spent with a Britney Spears mic strapped to my head, ra-ra-ing our wonderful clients, cutting up with instructors, drinking a million smoothies, getting wisdom and development from our studio owner, Flavia. Pure Barre has been a gift from God to me, as have the people that inhabit that studio daily. I'll still be taking classes, of course, but for now, I'm taking a minute to be still, to be thankful, and (at noon) to go get after it one last time. 

Nothin' but love, PB.

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5 Summer Hacks.

I know I'm in the minority here, but I hate summer. I mean, hate is a strong word - but it's also accurate. I am a cold weather girl because years of summers in Alabama, DC, Mississippi, and the like traveling throughout the Southeastern US have made me loathe those days of hot, sticky, buggy awfulness. 

HOWEVER. 

In surviving 28 summers so far, I've learned some things along the way. This list is a completely random assortment of things that I can't make it through the summer without, whether it's in the kitchen or in the great outdoors. Hope it inspires and helps you! 

1. Terro Fruit fly traps

One of the few perks of this scorching weather is the delicious produce that is available. The downside is, you have to be so careful about leaving your beautiful fresh fruit out to avoid breeding an entire army of fruit flies in your house. Last year, I made the mistake of leaving a bowl of apples unattended for a few days and we had ourselves a minor infestation. A friend recommended these traps, and they work LIKE A CHARM. We have three hiding in our kitchen and haven't seen a fruit fly since. 

2. This hack for shucking farmer's market corn

Another fabulous piece of produce you can buy at the farmer's market, but who wants to get covered in all those corn silks? They're like awful little witch hairs. PASS. 

Instead, try this! It works every time and is actually kind of a crowd-pleaser if you're cooking with guests. 

3. Chemical-free bug spray for a good cause

I am a person who is absolutely eaten alive by mosquitoes every time she steps out the door. Meanwhile, my husband sits next to me and never gets bitten. And I ask you, people - WHATTUP WITH THAT?? 

This bug spray is chemical and deet-free (which you'd think means "This bug spray doesn't work!"); however, it works better than most things I've tried and is much safer for you, especially if you have young children and dogs around. And it's for a good cause, to boot! Thistle Farms is an organization in Nashville whose employees are survivors of human trafficking, violence, and addiction. They provide housing and jobs as these women get back on their feet. Not a bad thing to contribute to, right? 

4. Dog cooling mat

We have a black dog absolutely covered in hair (seriously, how does he even have hair left after he sheds all over our house?) who gets plum tuckered out in the summer heat. We carry this in the car, and voila! It's a cooling mat that doesn't need to be chilled or frozen - just stays nice and cool for your buddy in the dog days (get it?!) of this season. The gel inside is non-toxic, so if you have a chewer, no fear - you're okay. 

5. A big ass hat. 

The one above is from J Crew (it's 30% off today!) -  I have it and wear it ALL THE TIME. The material is actually pretty durable and responds well to being folded/packed up. Gardening, at the beach, at the pool - it's great for covering your face and neck, which as so prone to sun damage and wrinkles. Ain't nobody want a wrinkly neck. 

 

What are some summer products you can't make it without? Please recommend, otherwise I will be staying inside for the next 60 days. 

Happy Wednesday! 

My Mom is Here to Make Life Better!

Oh my gosh MY MOM IS HERE!!! 

A few weeks ago, Jordan and I decided that we needed to clean out our whole house in preparation for the incoming third human member of our family (fourth overall member, obviously). As we started to look around, the amount of stuff started to overwhelm us. Had it multiplied somehow?? How had we accumulated all these things?! 

So we called in a professional. We begged her to come see us and help us get our lives together. Our conversation was basically: 

Thankfully, she is the world's greatest and it didn't take much convincing. She arrived last night, we had dinner on the porch, got treated to a neighborhood movie night (thanks, Carlsons!) where we watched Spaceballs and passed around April (my mom)'s homemade caramel popcorn. QUITE the start to the week! 

Our goals are: 

- Clean out all closets and donate items to Goodwill
- Clean out, organize, and get preliminary designs done for the room that will be the nursery
- Attempt to start cleaning the basement (YIKES) 
- Buy me some freakin' maternity clothes

You guys, the struggle is real. I'll update more about that later, but I brought a dress that is normally my "fat" dress (you ladies know what I'm talking about - the dress you wear when you need a little extra room) to a wedding this past weekend, and put it on to discover that my fat dress has now become skin tight.

Turns out, being pregnant makes you gain weight. 

So much to do, so little time. Jordan and I may have to forego a podcast this week because of my mom's visit, but if we do, we'll double up next week. 

Wish us luck! 

Fetch or Wretch: Met Gala 2017

It's that time again, people. Running down the celebrity styles, because you KNOW they care what we think. 

The theme for this year's Met Ball is Rei Kawakubo/Comme des GarçonsRei Kawakubo is one of (I think) only two designers ever to have been honored in their lifetimes at the Met Gala. As I'm writing this, it's Monday evening and I'm watching the outfits roll in. We should expect, per the theme, to see a lot of architectural and abstract looks. If there's ever a time to get crazy, now is the moment. 

A note: We at DHDG do not feature Kardashians or their spouses anymore. We're sick of them and they never wear anything worth noting. 

LINE 'EM UP! 

Fetch:

Gisele Bundchen

People, this one BARELY made the cut. Not because Gisele isn't a perfect human specimen (she is) or because the dress doesn't knock me out with fit and taste (it does), but because Gisele is one of the hosts of the party this year. And THIS is what she chose to wear on an evening celebrating avant garde designs?? I'm snoring. Next. 

Lily Collins

Now THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT. You werq that freaky goth Barbie ballerina of your nightmares baby doll wig, Lily! Perfect fit, perfect execution, perfect girl to wear it. 5 stars. 

Katie Holmes

Don't worry, I was surprised as you were that THIS name is on the Fetch list. I have had a longstanding, irksome feeling toward Katie Holmes and her stoke mouth-speech, probably precipitated by this bastardization of one of my all-time favorite Broadway tunes. Ugh I just made the mistake of re-watching that and somehow it's even worse than I remember. Anyway this dress is good I can't say any more about her, good job escaping from Scientology, see ya. 

Elizabeth Banks

I will never know if I actually like this or if I've just been hypnotized into believing I do. But for now, I'm so all over this checkerboard nonsense. Pretty hair, pretty makeup, pretty dress. 

Lena Dunham

Another one that I can't believe I'm including in this category, but it is so rare that Lena gets it even in the BALLPARK of right that we need to celebrate her choices. Even if she does look like a Scottish marm. 

Riley Keough

Feel like this would've been better suited for last year's theme, Manus x. Machina, but still. Cool, high-impact, well-fitted, and worn by a freaky girl. Do I know this person? What has she been in? 

Emmy Rossum

That bust line could be just a teeeeeny tiny bit higher to balance everything out proportionally, but that big ridiculous bow is the stuff of Southern girls' dreams. Keeping the styling understated was wise. 

Katy Perry

Okay this is very stylized, insane, almost difficult to look at, but I have decided that I like it. Katy Perry is also hosting the evening, and as I said, if there's ever a time to get weird, it's now. And Katy Perry is weird all the time. And her third eye is looking at you, so don't say anything mean. 

Zendaya

SHUTTING IT DOWN. 

J Lo

Yeah, it's boring, but she's still J Lo and she still looks amazing. 

Tracee Ellis Ross

YES. WEIRD. FASHION, BABY. Could've gone with a different shoe in my opinion, but I also just think Tracee is SERVING. She's had a great red carpet streak lately and it makes me happy. Although if you look at it just right, it looks like she put her coat on backwards. Or maybe even sideways. But no matter. 

Sean Combs

I couldn't care less about that dress over there, so please re-direct your gaze to Diddy, who is literally lounging on the steps in a CAPE.

Rihanna

Don't think about it too hard. Just love it. 

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen

Shhhhhhhh. No sudden movements. What we have here is a rare sighting of two New York specimens, old women at a young age, scary and fascinating all at once. They are THE ILLUSIVE OLSEN TWINS and they believe the camera steals their soul. (Just the one soul.) 

Blake Lively

This is crazy and I love it. Glad she chose something that wasn't too tight. I think this works really well on her and the blue feathers are everything. 

Cara Delevingne

Unlike fake British person Dorit Kemsley (you're either laughing at this reference or totally confused), real British person Cara Delevingne's metallic hair is FABULOUS.

Ruby Rose

Am I crazy for loving this?? Dead on the theme and I love that her tattoos are visible. I think it's cool. She looks great. 

 

 

WRETCH. 

Claire Danes

Let's play word association: sexy pirate hooker shirt from Seinfeld missing eyebrows barmaid. ...none of those words go together, girl. Whatcha got on your body?? 

Priyanka Chopra

I feel like I'm going to be in the minority of people who pan this, but I just...can't. She gets points for drama and impact, but that footwear is just plan wrong and the dress feels like weird cross between flasher and prom dress made by the weird girl at school. And it's a shame because Miss Priyanka usually turns it out. 

Rose Byrne

So close, and yet...not. I LOVE me some Rose Byrne, but this is just unflattering and bad in many ways. Although I am really here for that hair. Seriously. 

Sophie Turner

Off the rack at David's Bridal. 

Hailee Steinfeld

Do you think she looked in the mirror and thought, "YES. Nailed it. Overtly sexy, mildly culturally offensive baby. Exactly what I was going for." 'Cause, you know. that's what she got. 

Kerry Washington

That girl in the background is basically mimicking my exact facial expression. Girl, WUT?  

Celine Dion

Celine is self conscious so she's wearing a t-shirt over her bathing suit. Or, rather, under. 

Solange

Okay I wanted to like this so much. I sat here staring at it, trying to make it work. But I hate it. I just do. The puffer coat train is what did it for me. 

Nicki Minaj

NO.

Thandie Newton

CHIQUITA BANANA I LOVE YOUR WORK! 

Step Away From The Cellular Device

Last week, I was in Birmingham for a project that I'm working on with some of my former students. Ginny Tyler, one of my best friends and my host for the week, and I went to a cute restaurant downtown called Feast and Forest. We got our coffees and beautifully plated meals, and settled into our table. 

And then I watched a crazy thing happen. 

A group of four young girls, probably around 22, strolled in. They were dressed to hipster perfection: dark lipstick, topknots, denim cutoffs, mirrored sunglasses, ironic band t-shirts, tattoos of birds prominently displayed on the back of one of their thighs. To be fair, they were dressed more appropriately for the restaurant - Ginny and I looked like the lame young moms had arrived in our Lululemon. 

It was what happened next that blew my mind. 

Before they even ordered, one of the girls (we'll call her Sunglasses, since she wore them indoors the whole meal) made her way to a vacant table and started posing behind it. Another of the girls, Topknot, started snapping Sunglasses' picture. And not just one. Several. Maybe a dozen. Different poses, different angles. None of them included the girl looking at the camera -they were all candid. 

Ginny's back was to this scene, but my brow furrowed and I watched in disappointment as this experience became more about what they were going to post on Instagram than enjoying each other's company. It was far from over. 

The four girls sat at the table together, on their phones, waiting for their food to arrive. Not a one of them looked up or spoke to each other. One of them took a call and I realized that they were actually on vacation. This was how they were spending it: without interacting.

When the food arrived, like robots, all four girls took out their phones and started photographing their food. Once they were satisfied with those pictures, Sunglasses looked at Topknot, who wordlessly picked her phone back up. Sunglasses posed with her coffee: coffee cup on the table, coffee cup to her lips, coffee cup mid-way between table and lips while looking wistfully into the distance. 

Topknot easily took 30 pictures of Sunglasses before either of them actually took a sip of their drinks or a bite of their food. I was rendered completely speechless as these girls, totally ignorant of the fact that everyone in the restaurant was watching in horror, had photo shoot after photo shoot for their social media accounts. 

So here's where I confess that my hands are not clean: I love Instagram. I love taking pictures. I have certainly asked the waitress to take a photo of my friends and I after a special meal. I've taken pictures of my food. It took me a while to figure out what about this bothered me so much. 

Part of it was the lack of self-awareness; the open vanity and shamelessness of it all. But I think the bigger part was that it made me genuinely sad. These friends who'd traveled to be in a place together were so addicted to social media - to the idea of presenting the fun they were having instead of actually having fun - that they weren't even speaking to each other. They weren't having an experience, they were just crafting what they wanted others to think they were experiencing. 

How many of their friends, I wonder, saw those photos and were so jealous of the fabulous breakfast these girls ate together? How many wished they could be around that table, talking and laughing? Would they have been as envious if they'd known that there wasn't any talking or laughing at all? 

I listen to a great podcast called Hidden Brain, and one of the most recent episode was called SchadenFacebook, playing on the term "schadenfreude," or, "taking pleasure in other people's pain." In it, the host, Shanker Vedantem, discusses how social media actually makes us sadder. Until recently, we weren't sure whether the fact that people who use lots of social media were sad was correlation or causation; rather - are they sad because they use it, or are they already sad, and happen to use it?

A recent study done by Tel Aviv University revealed that it's Option A: we're sad because we use it.  Here's why:

FOMO. It's all about Fear of Missing Out. When our friends used to go on a trip, or hang out without us, we didn't really know because they weren't posting pictures of it left and right. Now, even if you've had the best day of your life - an incredible vacation doing adventurous things - when you look at Facebook or Instagram and see your friends back home at dinner without you, you automatically feel bad. Your day starts to pale in comparison to that one dinner, simply from a fear that a joke will be made that you won't be in on. 

ISN'T. THAT. INSANE?! 

I am certainly not a model citizen in this movement: I check my phone WAY too much, post an Instagram a week (or so). And I don't mean to judge Topknot and Sunglasses and their two other friends, because Lord knows I've been just as obnoxious in my life. But it made me sit and wonder what we can do to free this upcoming generation from finding their validation in a screen instead of in the mirror, or in the faces of the people they love who are sitting RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.

To figure it out, I'm afraid, we have to actually put the phones down and speak to each other. It's suddenly a novel concept. But it made me look at my own social media usage a bit more critically. I can stand to do better. What about you?