Tom Hanks is studying up to be a big brother!!
We're HAVIN' A BABY! YaHOOOOOOOO!
December 15, 2017, we welcome a new precious life into this world. Still hard to believe this is actually happening. I'll be back on Monday with a full update on how we found out, how I told Jordan, and how it's all been going so far.
See you then!
Summer is here, and if you're in the South like I am, that means some days are too damn hot to be outside. That's why God invented streaming services!
I've been watching several shows lately have all been better quality than normal TV is, so I thought I'd share the delight they've brought me by suggesting them to you.
First up:
THIS IS JUST SUCH A GOOD SHOW. I really can't even stand it. S1 was good, don't get me wrong - but it wasn't this good. Aziz Ansari really outdid himself this time. The acting, the writing, the cast (hello, Francesca, most beautiful creature I've ever seen), the sets, the stories...it all just comes together in this beautifully cinematic way that makes you feel like you aren't watching a TV show, but mini-movies. Did I mention there are many scenes in which homemade pasta is the star? 'Cause there are.
Ansari manages to tackle issues of race, culture, and sexuality with grace, tact, and humor - and without leaving you feeling like you've been beaten over the head with it. There are capsule episodes that will thrill you ("I Love New York" was a favorite of mine), romantic storylines that will intrigue you, and characters that will make you fall in love all over again. I have not one bad thing to say about this season. It was completely charming and I enjoyed every moment. #heycutie
Available on Netflix.
This is one you may or may not have heard of, but definitely need to watch. It's a 30-minute morsel of straight-up goodness and it has a dog in it. I could really stop right there, but I won't, of course. I'm long-winded.
The star of the show is Alison Tolman, who got her start on Fargo Season One (and was freaking incredible, btw). She flexes her comedy chops even harder on this show and proves she can hold down both a dramatic and a comedic series singlehandedly. Of course, she has a little help - the dog, Martin, is voiced by Samm Hodges. Now before you get all, "There's a talking dog?? No." There isn't a talking dog. The show is built around you being privy to Martin's thoughts and narrations. He doesn't talk to humans or other animals - he just a constant inner monologue that you get to hear. And it's hysterical.
Storylines include: Martin feeling like he's all brain and no brawn because he can't complete a dog obstacle course; Martin realizing that he can control various objects with his mind after he mistakenly thinks he made a set of automatic doors open by thinking about it really hard; Martin v. the neighborhood cat.
It's just good for your soul and it may get canceled because no one is watching it and WE NEED MORE GOOD TV, SO WATCH IT. It's on Hulu or on ABC weekly.
Ooooookay! So I've suggested two pleasant shows, now I'm suggesting this doozy.
Listen. It's hard to watch. It ranges from relatively to extremely upsetting.
But this show is really good.
Besides Joseph Fiennes (Commander Waterford)'s creepy overacting, this show is packed with people who are killing it from episode to episode. Elisabeth Moss, who I'm a longtime fan of after she won my heart as Peggy on Mad Men, BRINGS. IT. every single episode. This chick is an acting powerhouse, and since her station within the show's culture demands meekness, lots of her best acting is absolutely tiny - a facial expression, a look - her role could've only been played by someone who's able to deal in subtleties.
If you aren't familiar with the concept, the show is based on a novel by Margaret Atwood about a dystopian society in which a far-right religious sect has staged a military coup and taken over the US. Because fertility is a huge issue in this world, this group, the Sons of Jacob, have rounded up all the fertile women and forced them to work as slaves to high-ranking, pedigreed members of society in order to help those families reproduce. There's a lot more to it, obviously, but that's the gist.
This show is all about hope, persistence, grit, and women standing up in the face of insane persecution to defend themselves. It's worth watching because it makes you think deeply about rights, liberties, and personal agency.
Available on Hulu.
Are you watching any of these already?? Did you love them? Hate them? What are you watching that isn't on this list?
Well. THAT'S not good.
I'm going to include all the stories I (shamefully) read yesterday about what happened with everyone's favorite guilty pleasure spinoff, Bachelor in Paradise. The story definitely evolved over the course of the day from being about a producer suing Warner Brothers to a contestant suing WB. DeMario and Corinne's names were also both originally used, then the articles started redacting the Corinne's name because it now looks like Corinne is suing the production company as well.
So. Read up and draw your own conclusions. For whatever it's worth, I think we can all conclude that even if this situation turns out to be innocent, Rachel was right to give DeMario the boot. This guy can't stay out of the scandalous spotlight.
First this came out: http://perezhilton.com/2017-06-11-bachelor-in-paradise-corinne-olympios-demario-jackson-production-halted-filming-cancelled-reality-tv-drama#.WT30vOJOmEc
Then there's a TMZ article about it that I'm not going to link because it's gross and describes a lot of things that I don't want to know, so Google it if you're interested.
And then this rounded out the day: http://people.com/tv/bachelor-in-paradise-demario-jackson-sexual-encounter/?utm_campaign=peoplemag&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=social&xid=socialflow_facebook_peoplemag
What's gross to me is that producers have a protocol in place to step in if things get too drunk/out of control. WHY DO WE WATCH THIS SHOW, PEOPLE?? We are all trashboxes. I'm gonna go read my Bible.
Look, it's been a big week. We've had James Comey's hearings (whoa, btw), we've had lots of rain up this way, and all of that has made me a little Internet-browse-y for hilarious things. Luckily, I am a loser who spends just an inordinate amount of time on the World Wide Waste of Time, so I'm here to provide you with 5 things that will make you laugh or brighten your day.
*Cheerleader style*
Ready?
Okay!
If this doesn't make you laugh, I don't want to know you. I'm serious, let me know if it doesn't so we can stop associating with each other.
This is the sweetest and best and Robert really is Steve reincarnated. Also BABY BLACK BEARS. Also also Jimmy Fallon is scared of the animal kingdom with is kind of hilarious.
So I watched this in the car on the way back from my sister-in-law's wedding and I was just sobbing. Jordan thought something was medically wrong with me and was like, "Are you okay?? ARE YOU OKAY??" But I had headphones in so I wasn't listening. ...anyway it's incredible.
It's just funny and stupid and that girl reacts pretty much exactly like I do.
Listen, I really only had four things, so this is a throwaway but also something that made me giggle. I love Aidy. And I love SNL. AND I HOPE YOU DO TOO.
Have a great weekend, peeps! I'm going to my ten year reunion which makes me want to throw up that I've been out of school for ten years. Why?! WHY?!?!
I say again: Rachel Lindsay is THE BEST EVER.
This week, Mary Catherine runs down her Top 10 highlights of the episode, a special guest calls in to describe running into Olivia Caridi and James Taylor at a bar in Nashville, and Jordan's thoughts on Kenny the Pretty Boy Pit Bull.
Or whatever his name is.
And also, RIP Whaboom.
BOY DID WE HAVE LOTS TO SAY ABOUT THIS.
...and what our first lines out of the limo would be if we were Bachelor contestants.
...and "Alien: Covenant."
...and Jordan's predictions for DeMario's future as the show's sneaky trickster.
...and whether AJ is actually a serial organ harvester.
...and defending clowns.
Whew. Just take a listen for yourself.
Here's the photo Wes mentions in the podcast. And he's right. That top is exceedingly low:
